DRAMA, RELIGION

Eugene's descendants reap the benefits of his invention that solves all of humanity's problems. The utopia he created in space at first had casualties but that drove him to make sure it was a success on the deceased's behalf. The current generation upholds the utopia waiting for the day they are reunited with God with the promise to return to the Garden of Eden and be one with the universe.

FAIR

THIRD PERSON

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: FAIR

Commerciality: FAIR

Franchise Potential: FAIR

Pace: FAIR

Premise: FAIR

Structure: FAIR

Theme: GOOD

The book profile does reflect the singular vision of how a utopia could be created, but the actual plot is about fictional characters. Explaining Eugene's vision and the current conflict will help make the summary more about the concrete plot rather than the philosophiesbehind the plot.

That a utopia is created through inventions placed in space is a unique concept. Separating humans from being influenced by external forces such as nature or God is also different as a Creator is still part of the narrative.

The book starts out explaining the complex concepts and need for the Four Horsemen which is a lot of exposition before the introduction of characters. Introducing characters first will break up the exposition and increase emotional investment in the plan. This restructuring could also help reduce the amount of explanations as the solution and the problem wouldn't need to be explained separately.

THE STORY RELIES HEAVILY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

The hook is that there is a utopia on Earth created by four space monitors. The four horsemen of the apocalypse has been replaced by technology innovation with a fresh concept compared to ethereal beings in normative Christian interpretations.

Because of the religious overtones, the fanbase would likely be medium if slightly reduced further the ideas are also not canon to the story of Christianity's New Testament prophecies of the apocalypse in the Bible chapter "Revelations."

While the space conflict is unique compared to space films, the religious overtones are likely to dissuade the normally secular Awards circuit.

LARGE BUDGET

LEFT BEHIND, TOMORROWLAND, APOCALYPSE (FILM SERIES), INTERSTELLAR, GRAVITY, THE BLUE LAGOON

The original premise about humanity’s own inventions helping to solve their problems and correct the balance of earth is like the joining of two biblical stories: Noah's Ark and the Apocalypse. Instead of focusing so much on the world's problem showing more the struggles of those who create the solution with help increase the emotional investment in the utopia. If the utopia has no conflicts it is difficult to find the tension and rising actions within the story and remain invested in an earned climax.

Eugene and his family are hardworking visionaries who bravely work through tragedy and personal grief to complete their project to benefit the future. Their future family is dutiful and hardworking as well, sacrificing much of their own bliss on Earth's restored utopia in order to maintain the space stations.

It seems like a true utopia with no conflict; therefore in order to appreciate the happy ending, making Eugene central to solving the problems rather than having his actions structured as flashbacks would create consistent tension towards the long-awaited climax of rejoining Eden. Once the utopia is settled there isn't a lot of external or internal conflict to create tension.

Film - Studio, Film - Streaming

WORK IN PROGRESS

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

Centering Eugene as the main storyline about his struggle to solve the world's problems and the sacrifices his future family has to make to maintain the utopia will rectify the needs tension to create external and internal conflict. Because the utopia itself has had all of its problems solved there is no conflict to follow with in it so breaking up its history of creation by inserting the more personal characters will help maintain interest in its past conflicts in the trajectory towards the climax of the utopia rejoining Eden.