Brief

Robert grew up poor and mistreated by his mother, but his father came and saved him. He moved to different places with different people and worked mainly construction jobs. He became an itinerant hippie, then got married and had a daughter and settled in Texas. Despite health problems he survived and relied on humor and God to get him through tough times.

What We Liked

Robert had a disturbing childhood and grew into an adventurous and resilient man. From construction work to the Navy to living in a tent as a hippie, the story portrays some of the zeitgeist of the 50s-2000s as lived by a mostly single man following his bliss.

There could be a lot of laughs juxtaposed against a traumatic childhood. Robert's life is an interesting one and he becomes a master builder, while chasing girls, smoking pot and partying wherever the winds take him. His family is large, and as he's moved from home to home there is always something funny and sad but interesting going on. Despite a destitute childhood, health problems and an itinerant lifestyle, he has times of prosperity, and his wry take on his varied life is entertaining.

Key points:
A resilient lead
Empathy-worthy childhood trauma
Sex, drugs and rock 'n roll
Tragic life events
Funny and bizarre supporting characters

Synopsis

Robert was born in Massachusetts in 1951. He lived in an apartment with his mother and Uncle Lolly who was his guardian angel and they watched a lot of TV but his uncle moved out when he was 5. His mother wasn’t around and he had to fend for himself a lot, or sometimes she would bring him to the bar with him. He and his mom had the same room with twin beds but he slept alone and was scared a lot. One night Jesus appeared beside his bed then disappeared into his closet and he tried to follow him. He’d never been scared of dying since that because he felt love. They moved to another apartment where he had to sleep in the closet. He would play at a nearby construction site and didn’t realize he would become a carpenter one day. He became friends with Rippy, an overweight African-American kid and they would play. Rippy’s mother tried to have Robert taken away from his mother because of the horrible conditions he lived in. He was barely fed and was bitten up by roaches. His mother had lots of friends over and he witnessed a couple having sex on the couch when he was 7. He had a babysitter sometimes but she would touch his genitals. He played a lot of kid pranks and got hurt a lot. Uncle Lolly came back into his life and brought him a bike and took them to visit his aunt and cousins. He went to Catholic school and got in trouble a lot and had a used, dirty uniform. He didn’t finish 1st grade but went to another school. He wet his bed a lot and smelled and people would be grossed out. He would steal purses and money cans for charities.

Robert would go to a museum and was fascinated. He became a big brother to David, Loretta, Lorraine and Mark. Mark died as a baby and he thinks his other brother had a learning disability from eating lead paint. One day a man came to his school and said he was his father. He took him home and talked to his mother and bought him a Radio Flyer wagon. He said he wanted to give him a better life and Robert left with him and he never saw his mother again, but heard she died of throat cancer when he was an adult.

They moved to Greenwich, CT into a two bedroom house and he had to share a bedroom with his half sister Stinky who complained that he watched her get undressed. His dad would help him with homework but swat him across the face if he got an answer wrong. He got a dog he named Woody. His dad disappeared up into the attic on weekends and told him he was forbidden to go up there until he let him in and he had a new sweater - and an amazing model train set up. He went out to Stinky’s relatives in PA for the summer. They ran a carnival and he would take tickets and ride rides. Then they moved to New London, CT across from the Naval Academy and he’d watch submarines come in and out on the river.

One day he and his brother David were sent to live with a foster family who worked them to the bone. He was in 6th grade and great at art and sports. His dad would come by every few weeks until he packed up and they moved to Maine with his dad’s new girlfriend Robena and her four kids - Karl, Michael, Kathy, and Jonathan. He went to a Baptist camp for the summer then was moved into his paternal grandparents’ house with his two sisters. His Nana had diabetes and he had it too. Then, his father took him to Cape Cod. He slept in bed with his dad once and he was molested. They moved to Massachusetts and Robena and the kids came with them until they couldn’t support them so Robert and David were shipped off to a foster home. Robert saw a ghost in the house and many strange things occurred. They moved to a nicer neighborhood and Robert entered 9th grade. They moved to NJ and he spent time at the beach and continued to make out with girls. Robert moved back to the Cape and a man named Carl became his guardian. He bought a truck. He would dance and drink some nights at his house with friends. He moved to New Jersey with his dad and he tried pot. In 1969, his father made him sign up for the Navy.

Robert loved it and became a sharpshooter. He got his GED. He was put in the lower decks making repairs but hated it. His ship sailed to Cuba and they went to the beach and the Copacabana and got real drunk. Back in the US, Robert went AWOL. He gets a job at a hotel, then the FBI came looking for him. He turned himself in and was given a ticket to NYC, and then back to base where he was guarding jail cells. He was sent back to his ship and was given many hours of work until he punched a commanding officer. He asked to see the shrink and faked his way out of the Navy, stating he was claustrophobic. He was 18. He moved in with his dad and got a job at a sub shop, then in construction, running around with shady Italian mobsters in Boston. He worked different construction jobs, fell in love with a girl who left, smoked weed and moved around places with different friends. He grew his hair out and identified as a budding hippie. He tried LSD. He got a job driving cars and he and some friends took a car down to Ft. Lauderdale. He stayed, working at a Red Lobster and ate like a king. He and some friends decided to hitchhike to California. He went to San Diego then to the Sunset Strip and met Karen Black. He got weed from Tower Records and tried coke. He left LA, got arrested in New Mexico, got bailed out, and headed back east. In Selma, Alabama he met a rich girl named Diane, worked at a head shop, and got arrested for having weed and spent 6 days in jail. Diane’s parents bailed him out and put him up at their plantation for a few days until he and Diane moved to Brockton, MA and got an apartment. She left after three weeks and he got a new girlfriend. She had a baby and he resembled Robert. He lived in tents and various apartments and worked construction jobs.

He moved to Phoenix and worked in a restaurant. He soon quit and worked construction and lived with a girl named Katie and they went on hippie adventures. He partied at Alice Cooper’s house and took Peyote. He moved back to Boston then drove to St. Petersburg where his family had moved. His brother Jonathan held his mom at knifepoint and the SWAT team came and he was taken away. He moved to Texas and worked construction jobs and smoked weed and caroused. His ex Joanne moved in with him and they talked about marriage. They went back to Tampa and got married and his baby girl Nichole was born. They moved to Texas and bought a house. A tree fell on their car and Joanna was injured. Robert got flying lessons from Joanne for his 40th birthday. He used to skydive but didn’t want to press his luck after a few close calls. Nichole grew up and was shy at first but then discovered boys. Robert hung out with guys from NASA at a beer garden. He got hooked up with a company that builds nightclubs and partied and worked in Daytona Beach, amongst other places. He suffered from panic attacks, but briefly. Robert became a proud Mason. He has an out of body experience, feeling at peace and seeing other people who have died while doctors revive him in the hospital. His appendix had cut off blood flow - but he lived. His granddaughter Summer was born. He opened his own construction company and remodeled hotels until the financial crisis in 2009 made him sell the house and the business. He became the town drunk, then became a catastrophe insurance adjuster. He went to Nebraska and worked with shady people and didn’t make money. Back in Texas, he worked a variety of not so great jobs and had health problems. He encountered another ghost at a hotel. His appendix gave out at 65 and he would have died after another day of it going untreated. He became optimistic and relied on humor and God.

About The Author

Robert lives in Texas and works construction. He has a wife, daughter, and granddaughter.