ROMANCE, MATURE AUDIENCE, DRAMA

Sarah Jane is disheartened after her husband leaves her for another man. But instead of giving up hope, she embraces her true sexuality and starts experimenting in the kink world. She struggles to find the right dom who can balance real-life relationships with satisfaction in the bedroom. One goes to far, but another saves her in more ways than one.

FAIR

FIRST PERSON

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: FAIR

Commerciality: GOOD

Franchise Potential: GOOD

Pace: FAIR

Premise: FAIR

Structure: FAIR

Theme: GOOD

The book profile reflects most of the story. The logline talks about the series rather than the particular book. The short summary only discusses the last half of the book rather than Sarah Jane's entire journey. By explaining her motivation behind BDSM and how Gayle enhances that, but the conflict their relationship faces because of her past.

Sarah Jane's curiosity brings her new experiences, but she is very selective and clear in what she wants out of life.

Some of her relationships are meant to add depth to her character, but are not influential to the plot such as her children and some of her trial doms such as Lucas. Although he presents an interesting character, he is not a consistent influence once Gayle enters the picture. By either adding purpose to each side character or only including purposeful side characters, the narrative will be easier to follow thematically with continuously building pacing.

THE STORY RELIES A LITTLE BIT ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

The hook is that Sarah Jane is an alpha sub so she wants equality in everyday life and to just submit in sexual exploration. The creates tension with her lovers who are mostly used to having all control at all times.

This has the potential for the same fanbase as most sexual thrillers or mainstream BDSM movies. It could be popular especially given the ages of the characters being more in line with the audience for these types of films.

Due to its genre it is unlikely to gain nominations for prestige awards, but depending on the themes and graphic nature of the depiction, this might win awards within its niche.

LOW BUDGET

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, SECRETARY, 365 DAYS, LUST CAUTION, BELLE DE JOUR

The originality stems from the balance between Sarah Jane's romantic relationship along with her sexual relationship. By focusing on side characters that influence her inner conflict, the narrative will feel more cohesive and the pacing will build more consistently.

Sarah Jane is capable, curious, and hopeful. Gayle s guarded, generous and patient.

This has some neat explorations of side characters and really advocates for not settling for less than what you want, but certain developments could strengthen the story. Making sure that characters outside of the protagonist have inner conflicts and transformations will make them seem more realistic as well as give them purpose to the narrative.

Film: Studio, Indie, Streaming

WORK IN PROGRESS

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

By creating inner conflicts for the side characters and or only using influential characters to streamline the main conflict, the pacing will consistently rise more and the narrative will be easy to follow.