RELIGION, FANTASY

A boy finds a little dragon in his grandmother's attic. He then discovers that his grandmother knew about the existence of dragons and is taken to a magical place where he meets other species.

FAIR

THIRD PERSON

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: FAIR

Commerciality: FAIR

Franchise Potential: FAIR

Pace: FAIR

Premise: FAIR

Structure: FAIR

Theme: FAIR

It is accurate, but the author could add grandmother Osa in the profile too.

The fantasy at the beginning of the story is interesting to follow. The boy discovers the little dragon in the attic, which would be the announcement of a big adventure that is to follow.

The repetition ends up making the story a little tiring. Once David enters the fantasy world, the story starts repeating itself. Momma Dragon tells the same story we heard from Osa pages ago, about the day they met. This repetition makes the narrative loses its intensity and surprise factor. Afterward, little actually happens to the characters.

THE STORY RELIES HEAVILY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

The hook would be David's adventures in a world totally different from the human one. Communication between David and dragons. The teachings to come. But the narrative delivers little.

No. Despite being a story aimed at children, with a playful universe, talking animals, and mythological beings, the story development does not take off. The beginning is interesting and makes us curious to follow, but we don't see a big arc or a more complex structure able to attract a large audience.

No. According to the profile, the book is a fable with religious teachings, which would certainly be able to reach a specific audience and have the potential for awards in some religious festivals and categories. However, very little is said in the book about God or teachings, just about friendship. Hence, the book's theme ends up becoming too generic to fit into any more specific categories.

LARGE BUDGET

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON: A BOY CAPTURES A DRAGON, AND BOTH BECOME FRIENDS. THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: CHILDREN FIND A PORTAL TO ANOTHER WORLD INSIDE A CLOSET AND START A GREAT ADVENTURE.

There is nothing very original in the story, apart from the biblical passages at the end of each chapter. However, it would be interesting to see these passages more ingrained within the text itself.

The characters also look pretty generic. We know very little about David, Grandma Osa, Momma Dragon, about Baby Dragon. Everyone is very nice and receptive and kind, but beyond that, we know very little about what they think, what they feel, backstories that tell us anything about them.

No. It would need more narrative and character development to make it a more robust, more interesting story.

Film: Streaming

WORK IN PROGRESS

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

Since the author wants to insert biblical teachings into the chapters, it would be better to put these teachings inside the story, in a more apparent and more organic way, than alone at the end of each chapter. The religious teaching in a children's story is a good idea to appeal to a specific audience. So, it would be great to see these teachings being properly inserted in the story. Characters need further development. We need to know more about David. What he likes, how he thinks, what are his dreams, desires, fears. We have to know more about the protagonist. The other characters also end up sounding very generic. All of David's friends are kind and sweet, but each one needs a different voice. Otherwise, having these characters in the story would make no sense. It would be interesting to have a little more conflict, even if it is quickly resolved since we are before a juvenile audience. Still, conflicts are essential to evoke emotions in those who watch. As it stands, everything looks pretty positive and easy and nice, with one single problem that happens and is solved quickly. Getting Grandma to know about dragons is quite interesting. It's also interesting that they both forget about the dragons when they grow older. Perhaps it would be touching to present this forgetfulness as a symbol of the loss of innocence, that moment when the child stops caring about more playful and imaginative things and focus on "serious" matters. Being able to work this narratively can deliver an exciting drama to the adults in the audience. To remind them of what they've forgotten since they left childhood.