ACTION ADVENTURE SUSPENSE/THRILLER
When military contractor Nick Stowe decides to help Jarrett Edwards rescue his kidnapped sister from a cruise liner turned personal yacht. The ship’s duties have nothing to do with stage shows, fine dining, or tropical mixed drinks, they never disembark, and the ship never docks.
August 2010. Off the coast of Galveston, TX, Jarrett Edwards, having located his kidnapped sister, who is being held somewhere on the ship. Carl Meyer a Brazilian business man has been searching for a vast amount of lost jewels he calls his 'Family Destiny' and will go to extremes to keep secret.
Nick Stowe, who unintentionally interferes with the businessman’s plans and becomes the primary target. He uses his classified past, vengeful demeanor, and friends he calls family to help Jarrett rescue his sister and numerous other people who were forced to work on Carl Meyer's ship.
August 2010 Texas, Brazil, Coast of South Africa
Based on a True Story
Plot - Premise
Plot - Other Elements
Mature Audience Themes
Information not completed
Main Character Details
Name: Nick Stowe
Key Traits: Adventurous,Badass,Aggressive,Complex,Confident,Decisive,Crazy,Empathetic,Engaging,Faithful,Flexible,Honorable,Leader,Masculine,Skillful,Selfless,Blunt,Secretive
Additional Character Details
Name: Mark Burnett
Key Traits: Confident,Educated,Skillful,Selfless,Badass,Adventurous,Strong Moral Code,Heroic,Leader
Additional Character Details
Name: Tony Hunter
Key Traits: Adventurous,Badass,Aggressive,Confident,Educated,Honorable,Selfless,Masculine,Outspoken,Skillful,Strong Moral Code,Heroic,Blunt,Sexy,Funny,Sarcastic,Heartthrob
Additional Character Details
Name: Tom Mullins
Key Traits: Complex,Confident,Decisive,Engaging,Faithful,Educated,Honorable,Strong Moral Code,Skillful,Selfless,Flexible,Secretive
I see Family Destiny as a film with it's Texas, Brazil and Coast of South Africa locations. A Brazilian business man has been searching for a vast amount of jewels that his great-grandfather had written about with several of the the gems that were lost at sea. He uses a former Russian submarine converted to do underwater dredging search for them. He has been using fear to control people to work on his converted former cruise liner. Military contractor Nick Stowe, who unintentionally interferes with the businessman’s plans and becomes the primary target. What the businessman doesn't know is Nick’s classified past, vengeful demeanor, and friends he calls family. “Nick Stowe, maybe little on size, but he's big on fight!”
Nick, a former military contractor comes across the wrong guy at the wrong time, Carl Meyer. Accidentally interfering with Carl's search, Nick must defend himself and put a stop to the attacks. Carl doesn't know how capable Nick truly is and the underestimation costs Meyer dearly.
Authors Writing Style: FAIR
Franchise Potential: GOOD
Accuracy of Book Profile
For the most part the plot s accurately reflected in the profile that is executed in the narrative. The profile does make Carl seem more important than Nick so making Nick the active protagonist in the profile rather than passively reacting as an antagonist might help fix this switch. Also the use of the character descriptions is not the characters discussed in the logline, short summary and pitch which makes the characters written about seem less important for not being in both the description and the summary.
Draw of Story
The exotic locations are mesmerizing and the lore of Nick Stowe is so great that there is tension whether he can truly live up to such a reputation.
The structure of building up Nick as the protagonist works, but doing the same for the antagonist makes Carl seem like less of a threat as the structure begins to focus on Nick proving himself and talks more about Carl than shows. By showing Carl as the antagonist in the same way the protagonist is developed, they may be better foils of each other with equal character development.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY RELIES HEAVILY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook is that Nick stopped the wrong guy from finding his jewels but yet the guy seeking retaliation, Carl picked the wrong guy to seek revenge upon.
As an action film that include multiple nations this could have a large draw of a crowd given audience tend to like or are curious about when their home is represented on screen.
While this could draw a large audience because of its action genre, the same story as an action genre is unlikely to get nominated for serious awards, but could have a chance at popular awards.
Similar Films/TV Series
EQUALIZER, EQUALIZER 2, FAST AND THE FURIOUS 6, BLOOD DIAMOND, A GOOD MAN
What’s New About the Story
The originality stems from the exotic locations and each man living up to their myth as a fighter. Nick is an epic action hero with a loyalty that is unmatched. By showing more of Carl rather than telling he could be equally as developed as Nick so that it seems both are actively participating in the cat and mouse rather than one reacting to the other.
Nick is a rare breed of integrity and skill with a loyalty that makes him braver than everyone else. He has tenacity and perseverance. Carl is determined as well but on the wrong side of the moral compass.
Uniqueness of Story
This is a fun action film with a lot of potential for the locations and a neat water aspect to the premise for chase sequences. However the character development could use some improvement so that the antagonist and protagonist are more matching foils to each other ideologically rather than happenstance.
Film - Indie, Film - Streaming, Film - Studio
WORK IN PROGRESS
While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.
Tips for Improvement
Further developing Carl as an antagonist and refining his motive could help create greater emotional investment in the struggle with Nick. By generating certain dialogue choices to include more subtext, the supporting characters could be more distinct based off their speech patterns and differing beliefs.