ROMANCE, FANTASY, DRAMA

Ava's husband cheats on her and she files for divorce. She reunites with her childhood best friend Adam. Ave is surprised to find out Adam is from a secret world and Ava is part of it too. They fall in love and reunite and Ava must decide which world to live in.

FAIR

THIRD PERSON

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: FAIR

Commerciality: FAIR

Franchise Potential: GOOD

Pace: FAIR

Premise: FAIR

Structure: FAIR

Theme: FAIR

Yes the book is about Ava's self-discovery after her divorce via a love affair with her former best friend in a fantastical hidden kingdom.

The draw of the story is that Ava seems to either be hallucinating or being stalked by a mysterious man, and or even just paranoid because of her husband's infidelity. It makes Ava seem like an unreliable narrator when it is revealed she is actually being followed by the person she has spent half her life looking for.

Some of the dialogue is too direct to reflect realistic human speech. The third suitor of the therapist is inappropriate and does not add to the plot of Ava's character. Ava herself seems more focused on being with Adam rather than finding fulfillment within herself. By using the insight into Ava's thoughts, her way of thinking can shift turn from fixating on lust for Adam into more processing that she's part of a secret world, her thoughts on herself and marriage etc. Removing the third suitor could add more space for scenes developing other side characters. And having dialogue that is more nuanced will help create a more lived experience.

THE STORY RELIES HEAVILY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

The hook is that Ava goes from being an insecure wife who was cheated on to having secret powers and reuniting with the love of her life in a secret world.

This might have a small fanbase of people who like high fantasy world-building but also contemporary divorce romantic comedies.

No because the fantasy genre, aside from Lord of the Rings, does not tend to fare well with acting awards, but perhaps for set design due to the elaborate world that Adam and Jude live in.

LARGE BUDGET

AVATAR, THE OTHER WOMAN, THE SHAPE OF WATER, A BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA, WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, THE FIRST WIVES CLUB

What is original about the story is the secret origin of Ava. What could make it more unique is to focus Ava's energy on self development within the world such as her relationship with her father, her powers, the decision to stay, etc. rather than just consummating her love with Adam. Much of the book is about the romantic development instead of about Ava's new life post divorce. For example, she is mentioned as a vet, but that rarely comes into the story if at all.

What makes Ava stand out is that she was half part of a secret society in a hidden kingdom that she didn't know about for half her life. That this is the reveal when she thinks she is hallucinating is a memorable part about Ava's storyline.

Things that could help improve the story to be a unique divorce fantasy is to focus more on other relationships besides Adam to show more depth to Ava and add more worldbuilding and conflict that is not so black and white.

Film - Studio, Film - Streaming

WORK IN PROGRESS

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

Something that could add to the story is giving arcs to the side characters or removing some, to make their function more essential to the story. Another thing that could be added is more cultural conflict between Ava's new world and her acquisition skills of the culture and the language. Her transition from divorcee to self-actualized member of both communities could not just come from securing Adam, but from self-assessment.