Monstrous Men- A Garrison Family Saga
ACTION CRIME YOUNG ADULT
When a group of orphaned teens come together to rescue a friend, they enter a dangerous new world of money, power, and murder where 'Family' has a whole new meaning.
A orphaned girl, Marilee, witnesses a murder and one of her friends is adopted by the murderer. She has to convince her friends to go on a rescue mission with the help of a boy, Jamie, who has a mysterious past. When they find out that his uncle is the murderer, they are hesitant to trust him.
Marilee and Jamie get the family they always wanted, but not without sacrifice and loss. They are in this Family for life, but they changed the game. People from all factions seek them out to ruin them. Jamie thinks he finally ends it by killing the one who has caused him so many problems.
New Orleans and London
Based on a True Story
Plot - Premise
Overcoming Monster/Villain,Tragedy,Rebellion Against 'The One'
Plot - Other Elements
Mature Audience Themes
Extreme Violence, Language/Profanity
Main Character Details
Name: Marilee Jackson
Key Traits: Adventurous,Outspoken,Funny,Sarcastic,Honorable,Strong Moral Code,Clumsy
Additional Character Details
Name: Jamie Garrison
Key Traits: Badass,Aggressive,Charming,Complex,Confident,Sexy,Crazy,Outspoken,Skillful,Funny,Sarcastic,Secretive,Honorable,Heartthrob,Heroic,Unapologetic,Leader
Additional Character Details
Key Traits: Aggressive,Badass,Skillful,Obedient
Additional Character Details
Key Traits: Skillful,Outspoken,Sophisticated,Honorable
Monstrous Men is a journey to find family. In New Orleans, Jamie and Marilee find a bit more. Family isn't about blood. It's about loyalty, love, and those who would die for you. The Garrison's are lead by a vicious tyrant, who happens to be Jamie's grandfather. As they all get deeper involved with the family, they seem to lose hope. Soon, hope reappears. Loss and sacrifice forces them to change the game. This book is full of action, emotion, and drama. It would make a great adaption for film/TV because it is a family saga told from a different perspective. Jamie wants to change the rules in the Family, especially dealing drugs. He wants to cut all dealings with drugs. People will be interested to see how he evolves in the crime world with less crime and still have more money and power than any other faction. The Garrison's are the most powerful and richest because of the loyalty they have for each other. The characters are fun, sarcastic, and charming. Some are wholesome and sweet and some are just plain detestable. A mix of emotions throughout the story will have the audience enthralled. This story is sexy, funny, and exciting which will captivate the audience and leave them wanting more as danger and plot twists are at every turn.
SUSPENSE, ACTION, DRAMA
Marilee witnesses a murder and the boy she likes , Jamie, knows more than he lets on. When her friends and siblings try to rescue their friend from the murderer, they get introduced to the criminal underworld. As Jamie and his brothers and friends rise in the ranks, they realize who is pulling the strings. Jamie and Marilee are in love but the "family" has other plans for them.
Authors Writing Style: GOOD
Franchise Potential: EXCELLENT
Accuracy of Book Profile
Yes, the book profile accurately reflects the book.
Draw of Story
The story begins with the band of kids at an orphanage. Marilee is contemplating why her father left her and her brother's at the orphanage. She dreams that he will return for them. The characters are all teenagers with typical teen angst that is perpetuated by the "family" they have all wanted.
The story focuses on the relationships and dynamics between the characters instead of the plot. There is a lot of drama there but it could be more concise.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY DOES NOT RELY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook is that a group of orphans goes to save a friend from a murderer but find the "family" they have all been yearning for. They become deeply involved in the organization with many areas of their lives being controlled by the head boss.
This could have a large fanbase especially if made into a tv series. The story has many characters that would be best told in a longer format. It is a teen drama that has all the typical drama of its' genre.
This does not have awards potential as is. If the story was told in a more complex way and the character more mature, it could be taken more seriously. The tone of the story is very much teen drama which does not garner awards notice.
Similar Films/TV Series
VAMPIRE DIARIES, THE ORIGINALS, THE 100
What’s New About the Story
The story is not very original. There are many stories where young people fall into different nefarious organization in search of the family they never had or have lost. They decide they can no longer play by the rules and try to bring down the system and those who control it. To be more unique, the story could freshen up some of the typical troupes. There is jealousy, unrequited love, power struggles, etc.
The lead characters do not stand out. The characters are in survival mode most of the story and their actions are reactionary. They have distinct characteristics but nothing exceptional or out of the ordinary.
Uniqueness of Story
This is an average story. It is an easily digestible story filled with age appropriate drama. It has a teen drama tone and it delivers on that. It could be improved by elevating the story to a more serious tone. The circumstances are serious but predictable as is the dialogue. It could be more mature and create more gravitas for the situation.
TV Series: Cable, Streaming, Network
WORK IN PROGRESS
While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.
Tips for Improvement
To change this to a consider, the story needs more focus on the plot. The relationships with the characters does enrich the storyline but it overpowers everything else here. There is so much dialogue and not enough action to balance it out.