I kiss your wounds

Book Cover

ACTION CRIME DETECTIVE SUSPENSE/THRILLER MYSTERY

2000s

M.R. HOBBS

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Logline

This the second book In the trilogy about women in the Camorra Mafia. The fight for Vengance and justice waged by three women.

Genre

Action,Crime,Detective,Suspense/Thriller,Mystery

Short Summary

Rosetta Baldacci a powerfull Camorra boss finds herself in thr cross fire between two other powerfull women wanting revenge. Lady Catherina wants kill Rosetta for killing the men in her clan and to rebuild. Assistant magistrate Teresa wants destroy the Camorra .


One women jubilant, one dead one still to succed.

Setting

Naples

Based on a True Story

No

Plot - Premise

Overcoming Monster/Villain

Plot - Other Elements

Twist

Mature Audience Themes

Extreme Violence

Main Character Details

Name: Rosetta Baldacci

Age: 30s

Gender: Female

Role: Antagonist

Key Traits: Badass,Villainous,Sexy,Power Hungry,Secretive,Sophisticated,Leader

Additional Character Details

Name: Lady Catherina

Age: 60s

Gender: Female

Role: Emotional

Key Traits: Villainous,Power Hungry,Selfless,Skillful,Desperate,Criminal,Confident,Secretive,Manipulative,Leader,Religious,Badass

Additional Character Details

Name: Teresa Caporaso.

Age: 30s

Gender: Female

Role: protagonist

Key Traits: Adventurous,Sexy,Complex,Patriotic,Blunt,Decisive,Outspoken,Skillful,Sarcastic,Leader,Educated

Additional Character Details

The author has not yet written this

Development Pitch

The three book trilogy is suiable for a TV series because it deals with the vows two fourteen year old girls make to get revenge for the deaths of their fathers. Their rise to powerful position in there chosen fields inorder to fulill their ambitions. The toll it takes on their lovelife and friendships.

About The Author

I did have a publisher for the first book in the three bool trilogyt but they when out of business before they started to advertise my first book.

Target Audiences

Age: 18-34

Target Gender: Universal

Group Specific

Information not completed

Publishing Details

Status: No

Publisher: no one know

Hard Copy Available

No

ISBN

Information not completed

Genre

ACTION, DRAMA, SUSPENSE

Brief

Three women reach a high position in a business dominated by men. They come from different families and have distinct goals, but they have something in common: they seek revenge and fight for justice.

Overall Rating

FAIR

Point of View

THIRD PERSON

Narrative Elements

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: FAIR

Commerciality: FAIR

Franchise Potential: GOOD

Pace: GOOD

Premise: GOOD

Structure: FAIR

Theme: FAIR

Accuracy of Book Profile

It is accurate.

Draw of Story

It's about women as leaders of powerful families. The mafia universe is usually dominated by men in films and series, so it's a good surprise to see three women as the leads of the story.

Possible Drawbacks

It sounds very repetitive. The characters only talk about money and power and the other clans. It could diversify a little the subject.

Use of Special Effects

THE STORY DOES NOT RELY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

Primary Hook of Story

Three women seeking revenge in the middle of this masculine universe.

Fanbase Potential

The book is part of a trilogy, and it could find its niche and fanbase, but I believe it needs further development to do so.

Awards Potential

It could have some potential if it focuses on the internal conflicts of these three women who had their families destroyed by this violent and competitive universe. Other than that, it's just a story full of violence and action.

Envisioned Budget

MEDIUM BUDGET

Similar Films/TV Series

THE KITCHEN - THREE THIEVES' WIVES DECIDE TO TAKE OVER THEIR HUSBAND'S BUSINESS. WIDOWS - THREE WIDOWS TAKE OVER THEIR HUSBAND'S BUSINESS TO EXECUTE A PLAN THE HUSBANDS DIDN'T HAVE THE CHANCE TO COMPLETE.

What’s New About the Story

The original part is that these women are not wives of someone who died. They are powerful themselves.

Lead Characters

Three different women seeking revenge for their families. They are very different, but they have a similar past and present, a similar goal: to get revenge and justice.

Uniqueness of Story

Not a rare gem. It needs further development in many different areas to achieve excellence.

Possible Formats

Film - Studio, Film - Streaming, TV Series - Limited Run / Mini-Series, TV Series - Streaming

Analyst Recommendation

WORK IN PROGRESS

Justification

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

Tips for Improvement

The author needs to improve the writing style. It's too on the nose, too descriptive and explanatory. The dialogue is very flat, insipid, and it doesn't sound very natural. The whole thing sounds repetitive. The dialogue and actions are all based on the same plot, and we spend 200 pages reading about mafia, money, violence, the destroyed family, and nothing else. Aside from their high positions, they are human beings, and I feel these women could show more of their internal conflicts, their fears, their weaknesses. They would look far more interesting this way. The pace and structure are Ok, but it could maintain the tension and suspense far better. It's all so repetitive that, after some pages, we don't feel this excitement anymore. I'd like to know more about the characters to root for them, but they are all very flat. I believe this story has the potential for an interesting series/film, but the author needs to deeply explore the plot's possibilities to find a better way of telling this story.