The Lost Crown
ADVENTURE ROMANCE ACTION FANTASY MYSTERY SUSPENSE/THRILLER
Contemporary
La Kayshal
Logline
A symbol of wealth, power and prosperity the Lost Crown was never meant to be found, yet Ryan Johnson defies all myths and sets out on a quest to discover a thousand year old antique.
Genre
Adventure,Romance,Action,Fantasy,Mystery,Suspense/Thriller
Short Summary
Ryan, a lecturer in Archaeology, goes from London to Rajasthan, India in search of a lost crown. On the first day, Ryan's wallet is stolen by a boy, while chasing the thief he gets into a fight, accidentally messes up a beautiful painter's work, mysteriously the boy just disappears in the shrines.
After searching for clues Ryan, Deiva and Christian discover three sapphire stones, each of which has a master of its own. Ryan realises that the stones are keys to an underground chamber which possibly has the lost crown hidden somewhere. But there's a secret enemy lurking in the shadows...
Setting
London University, India (deserts of Rajasthan, Castles in Jaisalmer), Mainly has a fantasy set up of traps.
Based on a True Story
No
Plot - Premise
Quest
Plot - Other Elements
Happy Ending
Mature Audience Themes
Nudity
Main Character Details
Name: Ryan Johnson
Age: late 20s
Gender: Male
Role: Protagonist
Key Traits: Adventurous,Badass,Charming,Masculine,Confident,Decisive,Heartthrob,Heroic,Educated,Leader,Romantic,Skillful
Additional Character Details
Name: Deiva Chauhan
Age: early 20s
Gender: Female
Role: Protagonist
Key Traits: Adventurous,Badass,Confident,Desperate,Naive,Seductive,Romantic,Skillful,Obedient
Additional Character Details
Name: Christian Willis
Age: late 20s
Gender: Male
Role: sidekick
Key Traits: Adventurous,Badass,Masculine,Charming,Engaging,Funny,Skillful,Sexy
Additional Character Details
Name: Rathore
Age: 30s
Gender: Male
Role: antagonist
Key Traits: Aggressive,Desperate,Greedy,Leader,Villainous
Development Pitch
Imagine the hero chasing a thief in the crowded streets of Jaisalmer, India. He is surrounded by goons in a foreign land, he fights his way out of it, only to discover that the thief vanished in the shrines. He's determined to find the long lost crown of King Jaisimha, all he has to do is search the Rajamahal Palace. To gain access to the Palace, he agrees to a marriage of convenience and starts his quest with his bickering wife and friend. Easy it seems but its not. The first clue is the Queen's necklace which he only gets it through a planned robbery. The pendent gives the first clue, which leads him to an underground hidden mansion, he's attacked by magical vines, serpent and the secret guardians of the crown. He fights the goons and guardians, escapes the traps, solves numerous clues and comes face to face to the creator of the entire 'crown hunt game' ... the sorcerer. My book is an adventure thriller that will hook the Hollywood audience and appeal to the billion plus Bollywood fans too.
Genre
ROMANCE, ACTION
Brief
Ryan, an Archeologist, decides to go to India to find a lost crown. There, he meets a beautiful lady who catches his attention and ends up helping him in the search for this ancient treasure.
Overall Rating
FAIR
Narrative Elements
Authors Writing Style: FAIR
Characterization: FAIR
Commerciality: GOOD
Franchise Potential: GOOD
Pace: GOOD
Premise: FAIR
Structure: GOOD
Theme: FAIR
Accuracy of Book Profile
It is accurate.
Draw of Story
The pace on the first pages is nice. Everything happens very quickly, so we don't need to wait too long for the action.
Possible Drawbacks
It's a little bit based on stereotypes. A beautiful Indian woman, a handsome archeologist, a lost treasure. I believe the author could avoid some of these clichés.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY RELIES A LITTLE BIT ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook, in my opinion, is the love story. An Indian woman and a British man falling in love.
Fanbase Potential
I don't believe it would attract a large fanbase because there are many stories like this one, but it has the potential to attract people who love to see romances full of sexuality on screen.
Awards Potential
I don't think so. It's a story that was certainly made for entertainment. It would have to be highly improved in terms of narrative to have Awards potential.
Envisioned Budget
MEDIUM BUDGET
Similar Films/TV Series
RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK - AN ARCHAEOLOGIST LOOKS FOR AN OLD ARTIFACT. NATIONAL TREASURE - NICOLAS CAGE IS A TREASURE HUNTER WHO LOOKS FOR AN IMPORTANT DOCUMENT.
What’s New About the Story
There's nothing original about this story. It could be less stereotypical to sound more unique.
Lead Characters
I would like to see the female protagonist as a stronger woman. She is sexy and badass, but she could be more complex and interesting.
Uniqueness of Story
Not a rare gem. Being less based on clichés would be a good start to improve the story.
Possible Formats
Film - Streaming, Film - Indie
Analyst Recommendation
WORK IN PROGRESS
Justification
While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.
Tips for Improvement
The story of the sexy Asian girl who meets the handsome European archaeologist is very cliché. I believe these stories based on sexy relationships between two people from different origins have a public, but it could be improved to become more powerful. The protagonists are too flat, stereotypical in a way that their relationship becomes predictable. We know from the very first scene that they will stay together. Also, this treasure hunt is so usual in this kind of story that we lose part of our interest from the very beginning. I do believe adventure movies are enjoyable, fun to watch, but I also believe this market is already saturated. There are tons of movies like this one. The characters could be more original, more complex, more credible. The plot could also be more original, feel more realistic. The pace is not bad, the structure is OK, I believe it has the commercial potential a movie needs, but I believe it needs to become a little bit more original in order to stand out in the middle of so many other films like this one.