The Boy Who Hated Numbers
Logline
The Boy Who Hated Numbers tells the story of a boy named Rebmun and his pet bird he named Loro, who can count numbers like a real pro. The bird's job, as Rebmun's parents wanted was to wake up the boy every morning during school days and to teach him how to count numbers.
Genre
Children's
Short Summary
Greatly annoyed by the bird's constant counting of numbers every morning during schooldays, Rebmun threw the bird out of the house. The bird flew to the forest of Deervana where he was caught by a bird-eating giant called Tenten.
Rebmun dared the giant in a race in counting numbers. Rebmun defeated the giant and as a prize, the boy asked for the freedom of all the birds the giant held captives in his cave.
Setting
In a remote area in Western North Carolina.
Based on a True Story
No
Plot - Premise
Overcoming Monster/Villain
Plot - Other Elements
Happy Ending
Mature Audience Themes
Information not completed
Main Character Details
Name: Rebmun
Age: eight years old
Gender: Male
Role: Protagonist
Key Traits: Adventurous,Outspoken,Funny,Manipulative,Aggressive,Engaging
Additional Character Details
Name: Poutric
Age: 13
Gender: Male
Role: Sidekick
Key Traits: Adventurous,Aggressive,Confident,Decisive,Outspoken
Additional Character Details
Name: Tenten, the giant
Age: Matured
Gender: Male
Role: antagonist
Key Traits: Confident,Decisive,Villainous,Blunt,Sarcastic,Manipulative
Additional Character Details
Name: Deervana
Age: matured female deer
Gender: Female
Role: mentor
Key Traits: Aspiring,Confident,Engaging,Leader,Outspoken
Development Pitch
Rebmun is a boy who is a second-grader 8-yr-old boy who doesn't even know how to count numbers. On his 8th birthday, his parents gifted him a parrot named Loro who wakes him up every six O'clock on school days. Getting upset of the bird's counting of numbers, the boy throws Loro out of the window. It flies to an enchanted forest where is held captive by a bird-eating giant named Tenten. In his search for the bird, Rebmun comes across with Tenten and dared him in a race in counting numbers and for the prize the freedom of all the birds he has in his cave. The boy defeats the giant with a simple trick and the birds are all freed.
Genre
DRAMA, ACTION
Brief
Rebmun gets a talking lorikeet for his birthday. The bird is anything but normal and Rebmun discovers his pet is from a secret land. The bird wants to rescue his sister from his evil homeland, but gets in danger. Rebmun must learn to control his dreams in order to save his pet even though going so far from home disobeys his parents.
Overall Rating
GOOD
Narrative Elements
Authors Writing Style: GOOD
Characterization: GOOD
Commerciality: GOOD
Franchise Potential: EXCELLENT
Pace: FAIR
Premise: GOOD
Structure: FAIR
Theme: FAIR
Accuracy of Book Profile
Yes the book profile connects to the book although some improvements can better reflect the story. For example the use of math is a prominent part of the logline but not really the main conflict and more of a subplot. Similarly the development pitch has repeat information about the plot rather than expanding on the themes which help accentuate the marketability of the narrative.
Draw of Story
Rebmun's unique bonds with his dog Miles and his bird Loro create an enticing story with an unexpected adventure.
Possible Drawbacks
The inner conflict and main objective is not apparent until almost the middle of the story. Reducing the introduction and showing Rebmun's mission to save Loro earlier in the story will help make the narrative more streamlined and clear with consistent pacing.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY RELIES HEAVILY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook is the the bird is secretly from the Forest of Pines aka the forbidden forest that Rebmun is not allowed to go in but he must in order to save his bird.
Fanbase Potential
This could be popular as an animated feature for children/ families but might have a smaller audience if the special effects are more CGI related and live-action due to the complex world of Loro's homeland and shapeshifting.
Awards Potential
This is unlikely to have awards potential as the themes are a bit unclear but could be commercially popular as an original children's film.
Envisioned Budget
MEDIUM BUDGET
Similar Films/TV Series
RIO, OVER THE HEDGE, THE BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA, THE SECRET LIFE OF PETS, PAULIE, ANDRE, FREE WILLY
What’s New About the Story
The originality of the story stems from the hybrid worlds of Loro and Rebmun. Introducing Rebmun to his main objective and conflict of saving Loro earlier, would help accentuate this focus. Also adding more consistent math development to showcase this theme would help clarify which is the main theme and or inner conflict about Rebmun counting. Rebmun's inner conflict remains a bit unclear despite his transformation from the lessons his bird taught him about counting.
Lead Characters
Rebmun is a rambunctious, caring and brave young boy. Loro is a loyal and clever bird. Miles is a protective and fast-thinking dog.Varcoba is menacing and dangerous.
Uniqueness of Story
This has a refreshing premise but the pacing and themes remain a bit underdeveloped to truly maximize the emotional attachment needed to reach the maximum potential of the story.
Possible Formats
Film: Streaming, Indie, Studio
Analyst Recommendation
WORK IN PROGRESS
Justification
While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.
Tips for Improvement
Introducing the main objective sooner may also help create more of a consistent throughline for the theme development. Clarifying Rebmun's inner conflict as the protagonist will also help showcase why counting is so important for him to learn in his everyday life as well as on his adventure.