Michala
Logline
A rancher on the Arizona/Mexican border fighting a Mexican drug cartel trying to take over his ranch.
Genre
Action,Adventure,Crime,Drama,Other
Short Summary
A Mexican drug cartel is running drugs across Rance Saddler's ranch. He tries to stop them and they decide to take over his ranch by any means necessary. Rance becomes involved with Michala Papadopoulas whose family owns Twenty-six Mile Station, the local restaurant.
Rance, with the help of the Tosay family, crosses the border to attack the Drug Cartel's headquarters. Later the Tosay's cross the border and kill the head of the cartel. Standing on the porch, Rance tells Michala he is in the mood for something hot, white and sweet as he kisses her.
Setting
Southeastern Arizona
Based on a True Story
No
Plot - Premise
Overcoming Monster/Villain,Other
Plot - Other Elements
Happy Ending
Mature Audience Themes
Extreme Violence, Language/Profanity
Main Character Details
Name: Rance Saddler
Age: 30's
Gender: Male
Role: Protagonist
Key Traits: Aspiring,Charming,Confident,Decisive,Faithful,Flexible,Gracious,Heroic,Educated,Honorable,Masculine,Modest,Patriotic,Skillful,Romantic,Strong Moral Code,Selfless,Leader
Additional Character Details
Name: Michala Papadopoulas
Age: 20's
Gender: Female
Role: Emotional
Key Traits: Adventurous,Aspiring,Charming,Confident,Decisive,Gracious,Heroic,Honorable,Modest,Sexy,Patriotic,Selfless,Outspoken,Skillful,Romantic,Seductive,Strong Moral Code,Faithful,Engaging
Additional Character Details
The author has not yet written this
Additional Character Details
The author has not yet written this
Development Pitch
Rance Saddler inherits property in SE Arizona along the Mexican border. He is trying to start a horse business and is having problems with a Mexican drug cartel transporting drugs across his property. He becomes romantically involved with Michala Papadopoulas whose family own Twenty-six Mile Station, the local restaurant. He and Michala and the Tosay brothers, whom he has hired as ranch security, become engaged with the drug cartel leading to a violent direct confrontation with them.
Genre
ACTION, DRAMA
Brief
Rance, an Australian horse trainer, inherits a ranch in Arizona. His ranch lies along the route of a Mexican drug cartel. The cartel try to continue business and show their force when Rance tries to control their movements to stay off his land. Rance and his crew must take revenge into their own hands both for the safety of the ranch and to protect the family of the woman that Rance loves.
Overall Rating
FAIR
Narrative Elements
Authors Writing Style: GOOD
Characterization: FAIR
Commerciality: GOOD
Franchise Potential: GOOD
Pace: FAIR
Premise: FAIR
Structure: GOOD
Theme: FAIR
Accuracy of Book Profile
Yes, the profile reflects the content in the story. However, the ending of the short summary, the "hot, white, and sweet" line, would not resonate with an audience who has not already read the narrative. By replacing this ending with a summary to more accurately reflect the plot rather than an inside joke of a relationship the reader isn't privy to yet, the summary can function more strongly as a preview.
Draw of Story
An outsider coming into a small ranch town is tense unto itself for the shifts in relationship dynamics their presence can cause, yet causing an all out gang war for occupying a ranch is next level intriguing.
Possible Drawbacks
Some of the characters such as the cartel, the extra waitresses and police have static personalities. There are many to keep track of but they rarely advance the plot due to their character, but rather as their functional role in society. By creating more distinct personalities that allowing for dynamic growth, there could be more emotional investment in the side characters. The line that is repeated throughout the book that Michala is ""hot, white, and sweet"" is confusing as to why she needs to be white. Clarifying what this distinction needs to be part of the desirability of her as a woman or replacing or removing the word would help improve the meaning behind the sentiment.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY RELIES A LITTLE BIT ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook is that an Australian ranch hand has to take on a Mexican drug cartel with his hired help because the police are inept. It is interesting to see how far people will go to protect their loved ones in the name of justice while still trying to be moral.
Fanbase Potential
This could have a medium to large fan base of people who enjoy Westerns or dramas centered around drug trafficking. Given the recent popularity of similar drug related media, this could prove popular.
Awards Potential
This is unlikely to have awards potential as the characters go through many dramatic events however their emotional range is rather composed and action movies tend to not fare well in dramatic categories. Although the setting and the world building are well done, an Arizona ranch will probably not create notice for design elements in the creative awards either, as the narrative is set in the modern era in a naturally well-lit environment and awards categories like such tend to favor innovation in the creative field.
Envisioned Budget
LARGE BUDGET
Similar Films/TV Series
YELLOWSTONE, SICARIO, NARCOS, DALLAS, BREAKING BAD, SAVAGES
What’s New About the Story
The originality comes from the team work of the characters in order to protect their ranch and their success over the local sheriff's office. By making the characters have their own small arcs outside of the main love story and Rance as the protagonist, the emotional investment in their success over the antagonists will be strengthened.
Lead Characters
Rance has a lot of integrity and isn't afraid to make hard decisions. He successfully protects those he is loyal to and his horses not because he is particularly skilled physically, but because he works hard and does what is needed to get done no matter how small the tasks is or long the task takes.
Uniqueness of Story
This has the beginnings of being a solid modern Western involving the Mexican drug cartel, however even more character development and streamlining the pacing will help fix the emotional investment to the success of the side characters.
Possible Formats
Film - Indie, Film - Streaming, Film - Studio, TV Series - Cable, TV Series - Limited Run / Mini-Series, TV Series - Streaming
Analyst Recommendation
WORK IN PROGRESS
Justification
While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.
Tips for Improvement
The attraction between Michala and Rance needs to be founded on more than physical features in order for their relationship to resonate. Michala is portrayed as sensible and for her to date Triple G without him having any redeemable qualities does not compute. By having all the villains be more human in terms of layers and having redeemable qualities just like the protagonists should have flaws, the overall conflict will be more nuanced. The pacing between moving in and engaging in conflict with the cartel after turning down the lawyer could be more rapid pace. This would help focus the narrative on the cartel conflict as the clear goal rather having an equal number of scenes involving everyday horse training activities or romance.